As a transcription of a found artifact, the story is told
predominantly through Douglas G. Sheridan as he explains the motivations for
his crimes on tape. The fragmented
sentences and stuttered speech successfully capture D.S.’s insanity and the
anxiety that one trying to convey an important message in limited time would
feel. Though he claims to be telling the
truth, D.S. is an unreliable narrator from the beginning, unable to recall his
own middle name or what relative he was named after. It would be reasonable to assume that his
recapitulation of events will be skewed.
Also, for a man trying to preserve chastity, D.S. uses some rather
impious language, even if he is outraged by his victims’ lewd conduct. D.S. recognizes that his condition was caused
in part by a history of violence in his family, starting with his drunken grandfather. I feel that there is room for more back story
to explain why he was provoked to kill lustful women as opposed to violent
drunks.
I commend your creativity in modeling your story after an
official federal document. I could see
this piece as a series of transcriptions pulled from artifacts that D.S. has
left behind to play with the authorities or to more fully impart his lesson. I am reminded of Kevin Spacey’s role in Seven.
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